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Monday, August 16, 2010

More unwritten rules of a gym!

Previously I enlightened you on the top 5 rules of a gym - forgotten already, then let me refresh your memory - but it has come to my attention that there are more unwritten, yet very important, rules!

1. Don't you just hate it when you are there to actually gym and get a proper work-out when some lazy ass, or those imonlyheretolookpretty type, person comes and talks shit to you? Honestly, who cares? Don't interrupt us with your nonsense, unless it is of vital importance, like a bomb-threat. Otherwise, no chit-chat. Please.


2. Rack your weights, dumbass. S'all I have to say.


3. Ok, so this rule isn't unwritten, yet people don't abide by it. So, allow me to tell you how gross it is when you don't wipe your gym equipment when you're done. There is just nothing like the smell, and sight, of human bodily fluid to get my gag-reflexes working.


4. We don't just all stand in an orderly line for our own pleasure. Wait in line for the treadmills bitches. In general, queue skipping is just plain rude.


5. Relaxing in the sauna, after a long day and hard work-out, is really just so, well, erm, relaxing. It's especially nice if the temperature is not too hot, as in, not being able to breathe! Until some selfish person comes along and pours water all over the charcoal, which sends the temperature through the roof and sends me out of there! The idea is to sweat, not to dehydrate. The rule here is something yo mama taught you years ago: always ask before doing something. Politeness is what it's all about.


Ok, let's see how long before I've discovered more unwritten rules. But for that, I guess, I actually have to go to gym again.

J

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